Peru #4

I am alive! Its a miracle. I think I ate something that didn't agree with me on Thursday, and I was slightly dehydrated on top of that, so yesterday....I pretty much stayed in bed ALL day and threw up every once in awhile. No shower, nothing productive done, and on top of everything, my internet connection went out in the middle of the day. I've been trying to download the new episode of Grey's (I had to download an entirely new program and learn how to use something called torrents) because Hulu and Abc.com don't stream outside of the US, and I'm about to rip my face off with anticipation. Right now I am sitting in the little dining room area of our hotel, and watching Joseph prepare for his first Spanish Bible study ever! He is so excited about being here, which helps me stay positive when I get homesick. He has a lot more confidence than me when talking to the locals; he's bold enough to talk to all the cab drivers, market vendors, and people on the street we encounter. Ah! The family just arrived here to study the Bible and I'm so excited. Their names are Roberto, Jardin, and Magdalena and I already love them. Joseph is freakin out. More later.
<3
Molly
P.S. I've found that freshly washed towels here smell like doughnuts. Weird.

Later:
Todavia me duele mi estomago mucho ahora (My stomach is still hurting a lot). Joseph and I are listening to the alphabet song.... The alphabet is easy to learn! Speak in rhythm each letter gets a turn! And now we know the Spanish alphabet. <3

Peru #3

Some other cultural observations of note: The sizes of the food (los tamanos de la comida) are much smaller here; especially the drinks. When you order a medium combo of anything, you get what would be a junior size soft drink. Maybe its cause they don't have ice. Also, almost anyone you talk to is very friendly if you approach them, although they may have a look of discontent on their face before you start talking. They all want to understand you, and I'm getting much better at interpreting the rapid speech I encounter every time I speak to a local.  I feel like in America its more often the opposite, like someone might smile at you and seem friendly, but in reality they would rather not have a conversation.
  Hablas castellano? Si? Si! Hablas bien, pero quiero practicar mi ingles. I have heard that more often than I thought I would, and what usually follows is a conversation in which I speak mostly castellano (Spanish), and he or she speaks mostly English. That happened with a vendor today at the market we went to, and the girl was so nice, I didn't even feel like bargaining with her. I know she probably thought I was a stupid American for taking the first price she offered, but when she told me she was taking classes to make her English better so her daughter would have more opportunities, my heart melted. I am a little proud that almost all my souvenir shopping is done, though.
We went to McDonald's today, and it was interesting because McDonald's is one of the cleanest, nicest places to eat in the whole city. The best part about the trip was the mayonnaise, oddly enough. It had more flavor than normal mayonnaise, and I used it to dip my nuggets in. I thought about what Sara would say if she saw me eating something other than ranch on my chicken. :)
I think this evening we will hand out more brochures/flyers on the street corners with the young people from the church, seeing as Cesar (a neurosurgeon here in Lima and preacher at the church) has not given Ava the list of potential contacts for Bible studies yet. This is a picture of the street corner near Tottus that we stood at to hand out flyers last night:

Its actually on the bridge next to the street corner, but you can see the "ttus" of Tottus up in the left corner in blue. I am beginning to really love this city.

So far everyone we've met here has been absolutely wonderful. Our little youth group (comprised mostly of university students) includes Cindi, Mikael, Magnum, Geraldo, Julio, Carmen, and Miguel, or Miki (son of Cesar). Miki has worn this black-and-white houndstooth scarf every day that Joseph has been eyeing, and today we found one at a street kiosk for only 10 soles! Thats about 3 dollars. He also got me a matching one (mine's hot pink and black) and the lady gave us both for a discount. He is so excited about matching Miki tonight when we see him.
Funny story. On Tuesday, when we first met the youth at the church, Joseph and Mikael became fast friends. I also am quite enamored with Mikael and his girlfriend Cindi, because Mikael was deaf and now has a cochlear implant (its so hard to translate the speech-pathology jargon I know in English, but I try), and Cindi is studying to be a nurse (enfermera) and she tells me about the healthcare system here all the time. Anyway, we were at Tottus (similar to a Walmart Supercenter), and Mikael and Joseph suddenly went off a little ways by themselves. I saw Joseph look up at me and laugh and I knew exactly what they were talking about. As Joseph tells it, this is what their conversation went like (a translation, of course):
Mikael: Is Molly your girlfriend?
Joseph: No, haha
M: Your sister?
J: No
M: Your cousin?
J: No
M: Your best friend?
J: Well, closer to best friend than girlfriend.
M: You want her to be, though.
J: No, no, thats not going to happen.
M: You could pray to God for it to happen!
J: hahahahahahah
M: Well, whatever the case, (and this he actually said partly in English) you would make beautiful pareja (couple).
So then Joseph comes to tell me all of this, and not even five minutes after he tells me, Mikael pulls him over again and says
Mikael: You know why I say that?
Joseph: Ummm, no?
M: Because of your faces. Your faces estan enamorados. (are in love)
Needless to say, Joseph and I have had a good laugh about all this, and are very comfortable pretending to be novios (boyfriend/girlfriend) just to freak people out. I call him Carino or Amorcito, and he calls me Querida. Or in English we say "muffincakes" and "honeybunches." Its altogether very entertaining, and useful if I happen to get whistled at on the sidewalk. All Joseph has to do is throw an arm around me and they hush up. Too bad his eyes are closed in this picture. I love it. :)
Hasta luego,
Molly

Peru #2

Things I have noticed so far:
1. You literally might die in a taxi. Saying these drivers are crazy is the understatement of the year.
2. When they say sausage ("salchicha"), they mean hot dog. We have hot dog slices for breakfast.
3. They don't put ice in any of their drinks. Which is weird.
4. If you turn on the bidet without actually being on it, expect it to shoot water WAY up to the ceiling.
5. Everyone walks everywhere. (Except for near-fatal taxi rides)
6. People speak quickly. Keep up.
7. Pizza is the same internationally.
8. They WILL clean your hotel room every day, like it or not.
9. Most people are friendly if you initiate something.
10. If you're a girl, you have to kiss everyone on the cheek when greeting or leaving.

So basically, I'm not yet as enamored with this place as Joseph is, but it is growing on me. The culture is different in many more subtle ways as well; ways that are hard to put into words. The people are much more enjoyable than the actual scenery, although I can't complain about the prices of the objects I've seen so far. I'm working on seeking the Lord in everything I do, and not paying attention to worldly motives. We are here to serve HIM. More later.
love.
Molly

Peru #1

I have a Father who truly comes through for me EVERY time I need Him. It is once again almost 3 in the morning, and here I am blogging, and all I can say is how difficult it is for me to express the difference in my attitude after the last 24 hours. If I had more energy, I would detail the exact ways in which God blessed me today, because there were so many, but most of all I need to thank Him for giving me a spirit of strength today. I feel like I've grown as a human being from my experiences today, as cheesy as it sounds. All I did was take one flight by myself and another with a group, but suffice to say it was an experiment in independence.  Like I said, I wish I could describe today's events more thoroughly but I am simply too tired. I am so excited to be here in Peru, though. Praise the Lord!

Molly

P.S. Also, I have a huge amount of love and gratitude for my very good friend Joseph. I would not have fared half as well today without him to help me out. He has been a wonderful, God-given source of comfort and strength. <3

I'm fleeing the country

And my stuff won't fit in my suitcase. I mean, I haven't tried it yet, but I'm fairly certain its too bulky and/or too heavy for the plane. I am freaking. OUT.
But more so because I am lonely. I don't have a relationship or a boy or someone who I can expect texts from, or someone who wants to call and just talk, or someone who wants to spend every waking moment with me. I feel like I'm constantly checking my phone, and feeding off of attention from boys I don't really want or need it from. This is bad.
Dear God,
Please please please allay my fears about this trip and help me to know that it is YOUR will, and not mine that is being done.  I know how little I deserve your peace, but I also know that you will freely give it to me because I need it and you love me. My strongest desire at this point is to earnestly seek you with all I have. You've taken away the barriers that have prevented me from coming to you, and I am so grateful that you are helping me see how important it is to lean on you and only you.  I feel like I've been putting you at the bottom of my priority list...and its time for a few things to change. This is everything. All I have is yours. I love you.
Molly

To whom it may concern:

Face it, Molls. You have nothing left to check. No one is up as late as you are, and no boys want to chat it up with you cause they think you're cute. Give. It. Up. Stop refreshing your Facebook and Twitter pages, and go to bed. It'll be okay. You're exhausted anyway. No, it doesn't matter that your stupid brain is thinking too much for you to fall asleep in a timely manner; the faster you start trying to sleep, the faster you will finally start dreaming. I'm being serious, here. Don't be an idiot. Its a good thing you have friends that know when to stop talking to you cause you're being crazy. He saved you from doing something you know you would regret. Yes, yes I do think you're over him, as strange and alien as that knowledge is.  And guess what? You're still alive. God has given you yet another day in which to serve Him! Praise be to the Lamb for this gift! So stop lazing about and wasting your time; it was given with the hope that you would use it to the fullest for His glory, and not your own immediate gratification. Be happy. The Lord loves you and keeps you as His treasure.
Love,
Your conscience

Tengo que miccionar!!!

I'm giddy when I shouldn't be. Some of it I'm sure stems from the fact that I have an overwhelming urge to miccionar right here in my comfy little bed....but most of it is from the unsolicited attention I have recently received. This should be a blog all about boys; I mean, lets be real here, my life revolves around them a little bit. I had an ambiguous encounter last night with an ex-fling, a lunch time flirtation with an ex-bf and his horny and immoral best friend, and then tonight was hit on by my good friend's former semi-serious boyfriend who later got married to someone else (too young) and is now divorced or in the process of getting a divorce.... I assume this because his facebook relationship status is "single" now.  Also the most recent picture I can find of the two of them is from 2009, so the divorce has to be fairly recent.  Ah, the joys of facebook creeping.  He totally flirted and hugged me for too long outside the movie theatre and then wrote on my fb wall before I'd even made it home...at the risk of sounding a bit egotistical(to the no one who reads this), I apparently made an impression. And now lunch flirtation ex-bf (my very first bf, in fact) is texting me and telling me about how his current girlfriend thinks I'm a threat because I am "little and perfect and (she) can't compete with that." This makes me feel undeservedly and cheaply good about myself, and I have to say I'm a little disgusted with my brain for getting a thrill from it.  But it doesn't end there. He just said that if I were around more (as in, if I lived at home), I'd be a threat to any girl he liked. Hmm. Luckily, after my brain ran a few laps with that tidbit of info, it came to the conclusion that I would be very comfortable telling him no in a one-on-one situation, and still trying to be his friend and talk to him about Jesus.  I'm very glad to know that I don't want to date him....but its also nice when they keep following you around, you know? Once again, probably big-headed of me to say. I am happy to be 100% single. I'm actually very content. Also, I am going to try my level best to keep from making out with anyone outside of a relationship context. And the next relationship I'm in is going to be on my terms, and it is going to be done right, because I have decided to follow Jesus, and He has told me that I deserve better, and I believe Him because He loves me. :)
<3 Molly
 *Whew, I finally relieved my bladder.*

They bring me to you

How am I supposed to be over you when you go out of your way to call me, and your smile makes my heart do backflips? I thought I was almost there.... how little I truly know myself sometimes. 
And yet the feeling is tainted by the fact that you also wanted to talk to that other girl.... that part makes me feel ill. I have no room to complain, I just know your devotion, and I don't want anyone else to have it. I'm selfish as a general rule. You can't have us both! I don't know if you know that you don't have me anymore; I never got to tell you that I'm still angry, and haven't completely forgiven you for what you've done. The tables have turned and now I need to forgive YOU. I'm so confused about what I want. I KNOW I don't need to seek fulfillment from you, or any other silly boys. But its difficult to remember that my trust and hope and love lie elsewhere when you're grinning at me like you do. My resolve is weak. At least I'm up before eleven today.
Dear God, please fill me with your presence today in everything I do, and guide my body to do your will in all things. Help me to know that every single breath I take belongs to YOU and no one else, and that losing myself in you is the only way to find true life.  I believe it, Lord. Help me show it. I love you!
Amen. 


http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZQYhWPFDa6Y 
This song touches my heart.


Worthy is the Lamb that was slain...Holy, holy is He. 


Also, the song in the title is by Joshua Radin and its pretty awesome as well :)


<3 Molly

Do I have to keep coming up with titles?

I'm breaking out today. Its grossin me out a whole bunch. And I feel a little sick...Like, I've been coughing and my head feels all full of...pressure. I don't know, its hard to describe. And Wii Fit told me today that my BMI is less than .5 away from being overweight. Seriously.
So basically, I'm a dump of a person and my physical body sucks.
Isn't it wonderful that God has a new body waiting for me when He returns? Right now, I'm going to do a better job of taking care of this one He already gave me. This means no refined sugar or carbs (its so difficult), more exercise, a regular sleep schedule, and lots of vitamins. I'm aiming for health rather than weight loss, but I'm hoping the weight loss will accompany the health. I'll let you know how it goes. And by you I mean.... me. Cause I'm the only one that reads this. Which, if you are a stalker who does not announce his or her presence, I will tell you is more than fine by me. A website is cheaper than a new journal.
I'm going to go be a servant to my siblings now. :)
<3 Molly

This painting makes me happy.

Suckerfish :)

I love this suckerfish. He came from one of my friends' husband's facebook page....I don't know if its creepy that I stole one of his pictures and I've never even met the man. But it made me happy, so I did it. Today I WILL be productive, I will NOT text boys incessantly, and I will NOT care if they don't text me back. Also, being "in love" is such a weird, undefinable thing. I must've been crazy when I wrote that. Part of me was trying to convince myself that I was because I want this particular person to be in love with me back so much....but honestly I haven't been in love since Will. I have this new little thing going on with this other boy, but I think I freaked him out, since he hasn't texted me all day and he usually does when he wakes up. Okay I know, I don't need to jump to conclusions here, and its just a text, and he's just a boy, and we've only been piddlenarfing for a week. I just hate myself for being awkward around him. But its hard when he's awkward around me. Its not even really a thing. I don't even know if I like the kid, I just haven't had time to determine whether or not I do cause we JUST started to get to know each other. Quick sidenote: I had a Matt Hoffmeister dream for the first time in a long time, and it was weird. I think even now I still have some sort of strange attachment/attraction to him, and I haven't seen nor talked to him in weeks. In my dream he said we could never be together, and it made dream-me really sad.  It started with some kind of church function or something where we were sitting at a dinner table ordering food, and someone asked Matt what had happened between us. and Matt was all mysterious, and goes "Basically nothing, but now it really would be nothing if anything were to start up again," meaning, something was different in that he could never like me now. And next I won some sort of drawing in which I received a sparkly ticket from Harding to erase any holds of any amount on my account balance. I examined this ticket in the courtyard of my old elementary school, Nichols Hills Elementary. I hope that courtyard is still there. And then the next thing I remember is driving with a Nate Allison-Matt combination (I knew it was Nate, and at the same time I knew it was Matt) and some shining guy with an ax was chasing the car, only he could run really really fast. But he slowed down as we approached this big barn that was hosting a huge party, and at that point the shiny guy's ax turned into a gun, and he started shooting at all the partygoers. This triggered a response from a bunch of the guests who were apparently allied with the shiny guy, and it turned into a big fight that Nate-Matt and I just drove away from. We stopped at a gazebo, and then the allied warrior people showed up, one of whom was Caleb Hancock. I remember something about a legend, and I was a part of the group, and Nate-Matt loved me, or something. Thats basically the end, though.  

Sooo....I leave for Peru ONE WEEK from today. How weird is that?

Finals Week

I'm reading again. I forgot how fulfilling the love of a good book is. True Colors by Kristin Hannah. Haley Jane Witt said something interesting the other day; she was like "Finals week is my favorite week of the year, cause its just so relaxed. You honestly have more time than any other week." I had never looked at finals week that way, and it was rather eye-opening. I'm glad to have a new perspective.

I went skinny dipping tonight, and although it doesn't seem very daring looking back at the actual events... I feel very accomplished. We looked at the stars for a long time. I got goosebumps from the sheer number of them and the space they took up in the sky, which was absolutely cloudless and a deep indigo color. God was near to us this evening.

The walls are going up again. I forgot how good I am at this...or maybe I've never been quite this good at it. I'm a little scared that I'm really just shoving things inside my little fortress and someday someone's going to attack and the whole thing will just crumble and then explode.... but that is a scary thought, and one I am unlikely to entertain for very long because the walls make it possible for me to be pretty much happy-go-lucky all the time. I feel positive about my life. Is that God's influence or my own avoidance or a real acceptance of the situation??? I can't be sure.